As we move towards Christmas and an extended break where young people have more time on their hands than usual, this message, courtesy of Kirra Pendergast from Safe on Social is very timely. Do not forget to visit their for further tips and hints on managing digital technology and devices over the school break.
We are 45 days out from Christmas and many young people are eager to add a smartphone to their wish list. It may seem like the perfect gift to keep them connected, entertained, and fitting in with their friends. But gifting a smartphone during these special occasions can actually lead to more challenges than you expect. A smartphone is not just another fun gadget. It opens the door to social media, internet access, and constant communication, which require maturity and supervision. Giving it as a gift can downplay the serious responsibilities that come with it;
your child may see it as just another cool present, but they need to understand the importance of using it responsibly. Without proper preparation, they could face online risks like cyberbullying, inappropriate content, or sharing too much personal info. A smarter approach is introducing a phone when both you and your child are ready to handle it as a tool, not a toy.
Want to know if your child is ready? Use this self-assessment tool that can be reused for each app or device
Important topics like screen time and online safety will not stick in the middle of holiday chaos. With so many distractions, your child might need help to fully grasp the seriousness of smartphone use. A better alternative is to save the phone for a calmer time when you can set boundaries without competing with holiday hype.
When a smartphone is a gift, it can muddle the lines of who is in charge. Your child might think they call the shots because it is "their" present. Your child could resist phone rules, thinking ownership means total control. A phone-as-a-gift mentality makes setting limits feel like you are taking away their prize. Make it clear that a smartphone is a shared family responsibility, not a free pass for unlimited use.
Gifting a phone sets a dangerous precedent that technology is the ultimate prize. This can lead to unhealthy attachments. Treating a phone like a prize makes it hard for your child to see it as a tool, not a status symbol. Young people who view tech as a reward may struggle to establish healthy limits later on. Help them understand that technology is a useful tool, not something that defines their worth or is tied to rewards.
Holidays and birthdays are already filled with excitement, and adding a smartphone into the mix can easily pull your child away from the family fun. Once they unwrap their new phone, they may get lost in apps, games, or social media, shifting their focus away from spending meaningful time with loved ones. Instead of being fully present during family activities, they might end up glued to their device, missing out on important interactions and shared moments. Introduce the phone during quieter times, so it does not distract from holidays.
By delaying the gift of a smartphone, you are teaching your child valuable lessons in patience and responsibility, essential skills for managing technology in a healthy way. Focus on their readiness and maturity. The timing of when they get a smartphone should be based on their ability to handle its responsibilities, not just because it is a special occasion. This approach helps your child understand that a smartphone is something earned through demonstrating responsibility and trustworthiness, not simply another present to unwrap. By waiting for the right moment, you reinforce the idea that privileges come with accountability, setting them up for more responsible tech use in the future.
Annette Box